Today is really an exhuasting, straining day for 3P! Not because of anything special, but just the amount of walking, running and climbing up/down the stairs we had to do! My leg is aching! [probably because i have not exercised for quite awhile now, excluding training though]

Not much happened today. Seriously, people who come to my blog, don't really bother to read [unless i ask you too] since my days are usually average, nothing exciting happening. =S

Anyway, i was just thinking how once something has passed, you wished you had a time machine to travel back in time because you feel that what you have chosen to do is not very logical, or smart. I feel or think that way most of the time. I regret. I do not feel satisfied with myself, with my life, with my choices. But why? Why can't we make the right decision at that very moment? And not an hour, a day or even a year later? I often feel embarressed at my doings and keep as quiet about it as possible.

For example, i remember once in primary4, my parents were called to school because i was this very naughty student. Didn't bother to hand in homework and coming up with silly excuses. So my parents did come, and they did not scold me at all. But gave me that disappointed-in-you face which is so much worse than scolding and screaming. Everytime i remember that incident, i regret not being a well-behaved student and all. Sounds like it really doesnt matter, but it does.

Another more painful one, concerns my paternal grandmother. When she passed away, i started regretting. Regretting not spending enough time with her, not getting to know her. And now that she is gone, i cannot make up for what i did not do! I realise how little i know about her, but how wonderful a woman she was. This, is definitely going to haunt me for the rest of my life.

9.1.06
(SALVATION)